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December 4th, 2003

Sometimes I sit in my room at night and watch the snow falling. It can be so beautiful. I can lose myself in the currents and eddies as the wind carries it across the night sky. Just imagine myself being drawn far away on the breeze. Far away from the difficulties, the troubles and the trials, the stares and insults, the people who don't understand and don't want to. Sometimes I just let myself go and disappear with them, over the trees and into the distance. Where no one knows who you are or what you're doing. The struggle and the battle you fight everyday between the perceived and the truth. The facade you've built to appease others and fit in, ready to crumble and dissolve. To be swept away like sand beneath the tide until it's only you. Laid bare. Revealed as you were always meant to be, a child beneath the stars. With the same strengths and faults as any other. And happy to live your life in peace, accepted for what you were always intended to be. Where ideas of gender and stereotypes are just a whispering memory, disappearing into the darkness. Where people care about your thoughts and feelings and about what makes you you; and not about whether your life fits the mold. Where you can simply exist. To be. And not to be questioned. Where time will slowly slip by without the puzzling looks, without the faked concern. Until the day when those tribulations fade away and your mind can turn to more important things. To living. To life.

Sometimes I sit in my room at night and watch the snow falling. And dream...


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