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Curious about something I haven't answered here? Send me an email and I may include it on this page. At the very least I'll send you a response. Cheers :-)

10 Things Not To Ask/Say:

10. "Can you have an orgasm?"
--Can you have an intelligent conversation? Is that really relevant to anything?

9. "What's your hourly rate?"
--You know occasionally some of us transition to better our lives, rather than for pornography or prostitution.

8. "How often do you crossdress?"
--Only when I go out in "boy-mode", how often do you insult people?

7. "Can I tell you my sexual fantasies?"
--I'm not your pschiatrist, please take your perversions elsewhere.

6. "Are you a top or bottom?"
--OMG, won't even dignify that one...

5. "Will you help feminize me?"
--Ick!

4. "Do you like to dress up like anything?"
--You mean like a cowboy or an indian? Please, this question again trivializes transsexuals. It's not about the clothes, people!

3. "You look very nice for a shemale."
--Shemale is a pornography term. Use it to describe me at your own peril.

2. "So you have boobs and a penis?"
--Is that really necessary? At least try to use a little more tact if you insist on asking that.

1. "Wow, you look so much like a real woman."
--Gee thanx, good to know you don't consider me female.



FAQ


Curious about how the people I've come out to have reacted? Click here...

"If there are no stupid questions, then what kind of questions do stupid people ask? Do they get smart just in time to ask questions?"

--Scott Adams

01 Who are you?
02 Are you a guy or a girl?
03 What do you identify as?
04 Where are you from?
05 Do you go to school/work?
06 What are you studying?
07 Age/height/weight/hair color/eye color/etc?
08 Why do you do this?
09 When did this start?
10 What do you hope to accomplish by doing this?
11 Are you currently taking hormones?
12 Have you had any surgeries?
13 Do you plan on having "The operation"?
14 Do you live full time as a girl?
15 Are those your real breasts?
16 When do you hope to complete your transition?
17 How have family/friends dealt with this?
18 Why do you have a website?
19 Do you find men or women more attractive?
20 Can we chat online?
21 Can I send you an email?
22 Can we meet in person?
23 Do you want to date?
24 Do you "cyber"?
25 Do you doctor your pictures at all?
26 Do you have any naked pictures to send me?
27 Can I send you a naked picture?
28 Where can I see a picture of you as a guy?
29 Do you escort?
30 How can I catch up to you in chat?
31 Where do you see yourself in five years?

01 Who are you?

Andrea Portman. A young, 20's, transgender identified girl trying to get something out of life and share her thoughts and experiences with others along the way.

02 Are you a guy or a girl?

This question may not be as straight forward as it would initially appear to be. If you mean was i born male or female then the answer is male. According to my birth certificate I am a boy. But male only describes my anatomy, the person I am is completely different. I view myself as being female and always have for as long as I can remember. So when you ask if I'm a guy or girl, if you mean what do I see myself as, then the answer is definitely a girl.

03 What do you identify as?

First and foremost, I see myself as a woman. I have no other choice, that's what I am, that's what I identify with. However, many people have difficulty when talking with me whether to describe me as a ts/tg/etc. I suppose at the moment, I identify most with a label of being transgendered. While this is a rather broad, all encompassing term, I feel that I am neither a crossdresser/transvestite (although for a while this is how I perceived myself) nor a transexual (I haven't had SRS/GRS yet but I suppose I could fit into this category as I am on hormones). So I guess for the time being, I'll describe myself as transgender or a transgender male to female.

04 Where are you from?

I was born and have lived all my life in (western) New York. Let's leave it at that.

05 Do you go to school/work?

At the moment, I'm a grad student, having finished my bachelors degree. I don't work, due to my current class load (around 26-30 credit hours per semester).

06 What are you studying?

Although I used to discuss this in detail with people, I've decided recently to leave this topic alone. Better not to have people coming to class looking for me. I know most of you are good people, but the internet attracts its own contingency of weirdos.

07 Age/height/weight/hair color/eye color/etc?

Go up and click on the BIO link at the top of the page.

08 Why do you do this?

This is an interesting question I often get from people who stumble upon my site without searching for transgender/etc. themes. And, like all interesting questions, it is quite valid, but I'm afraid the answer doesn't always satisfy people. When I'm asked this question, I usually ask the person Why they breath/eat/sleep? The answer is that I am doing this because I have to. If I didn't then I couldn't survive. It's extremely difficult for people who take their gender for granted to understand the motives behind transitioning. It's not something that one chooses to do. I'm only doing what I must. It's kind of like if you were to wake up from a dream to find that you were suddenly in the wrong body, in someone else's body. Wouldn't you do everything you could to get back into your body? Into the body you belong in? Well, that's what I'm doing, trying to get into the body I belong in.

09 When did this start?

My first memory of dressing in girls clothes was around the age of 3 or 4. Of course, at that time I didn't really consider my motives (4 year olds don't know what motives are). Eventually I recognized that there was a fundamental difference between boys and girls, and since that point I've known that I ultimately had to become a girl eventually.

10 What do you hope to accomplish by doing this?

Quite simply, I hope to become female in every way. As a transgender individual transitions, they pick up the qualities of the sex they are moving towards (at least those they don't already posses). So by the time I have finished my transition I hope to pass as a woman every day without effort, just like any other woman would. Further, I want to be able to interact with others in society (social situations, work environment, etc) in the capacity of a female. The latter is at the heart of my reasons for transitioning. I'm sure this could be much longer, but I guess that can be saved for another time.

11 Are you currently taking hormones?

Yes I am and have been since April of 2003. For more information, see the links at the top of this page.

12 Have you had any surgeries?

As of yet, no. Finances are tight for a transitioning girl still in college. Sad but true. I hope to get started with these soon. Hopefully we don't get anymore tuition hikes.

13 Do you plan on having "The operation"?

For many transgender women, having SRS/GRS is the defining moment in their lives when they finally feel female. For me this is not the case. Although, I can understand why some women feel this way, everyone is different. My difficulties are not so much with my anatomy, but instead, with the stereotypes and social positions I am pushed into by society for being defined by what's between my legs. In the grander scheme of things and a little down the road, I probably will have SRS, but I'm not in any hurry.

14 Do you live full time as a girl?

Not at the moment. Unfortunately, it's not as easy as deciding one day to start living full time as a woman. Especially with school, things take some minipulating. I wish I was living full time every day, but right now I have to settle for a split where I'm a guy at school and a girl the rest of the time.

15 Are those your real breasts?

Is that important? Or any of your business? When was the last time you asked a girl if her breasts were real? Well at any rate, the answer is yes and no. Some of my pictures are all me, no enhancement. Some of the others (most notably the earlier ones) have some mild enhancement via inserts.

16 When do you hope to complete your transition?

Given the choice, I would chose to have been finished at birth, or rather, as soon as possible. Unfortunately, transitioning costs money (a whole lot of it). So, at this point, I'm hoping to finish up in the next two years or so. Although it may take me several years more to have SRS, assuming I decide to do that.

17 How have family/friends dealt with this?

Among those who know, some are better, some are worse. It's difficult for others to handle this sort of thing. As a transgender individual, it's important to remember that you've had you're entire life to understand yourself and deal with these issues. Friends and family, however, are more likely than not getting all of this dumped on them as a surprise. It takes time for people to come to terms with a loved one's transexuality.

18 Why do you have a website?

I started my website for several reasons. Mostly I wanted to share my experiences with other younger transgender girls out there. When I first got on the internet in 1993 there wasn't a whole lot out there about this sort of thing and even less for younger girls. So I hope that by creating this site, other girls who were in the same position I was will at least have someone else they can relate to who has been through it before. There are other reasons for my website too. It's a good form of expression. Like art. It's also my "diary". It's like having a good friend to complain to who will never get bored with you. And of course, there's the fact that I'm insanely vane. Couldn't you tell from all my pictures? ;-)

19 Do you find men or women more attractive?

This is another question I get a lot (mostly from guys). To be honest with you, I'm not attracted to people based on their gender. I don't have the ideal mate, in fact I don't even have many preferences concerning physical attributes, ethnicity/race, age, etc. I'm interested in the person. I tend to be most attracted to people who are interesting and funny, people who can make light of difficult situations, and those who are just all around happy. I'm not really into the whole matcho thing or people who are catty and complain. Is that too much to ask?

20 Can we chat online?

We can if you promise to be polite. As was mentioned above, I am not interested in helping you get off. If you say hello and I'm around, I'll definitely answer you. Just don't send me a message that starts with A/S/L? And please don't be too pushy, that's a total turn off and is annoying to deal with. I actually made a long journal entry about all this. Check there.

21 Can I send you an email?

Sure. Sometimes I get a little behind on things, so give me a little time to respond. I do my best to answer everyone. My email is here.

22 Can we meet in person?

Even if you are the nicest person in the world, this is unlikely. The internet isn't the safest place in the world so my policy is generally that internet friends stay on the internet. Now that doesn't mean that if we talk every few days for six months that I'll still have issues, just don't expect me to be interested in meeting you the first few times we chat.

23 Do you want to date?

See #22. Again, this is unlikely.

24 Do you "cyber"?

While I understand that for some people, the internet exists so they can better pleasure themselves between the legs, this is not the case for me. Please don't send me a chat invitation to do this sort of thing or you will quickly make my iggy list. I don't have much patience for this sort of thing. Of course, the people who really want that sort of thing probably aren't reading this so, whatever.

25 Do you doctor your pictures at all?

No, my pictures are all 100% me. Don't you think I'd make myself look better if I fooled around with my pictures on photoshop?

26 Do you have any naked pictures to send me?

No. Don't ask.

27 Can I send you a naked picture?

No. Don't ask.

28 Where can I see a picture of you as a guy?

I don't make those available. Some girls are happy to post pictures of them as a guy. I am not one of them.

29 Do you escort?

No I don't. I understand that some girls do. I'm not judging, it's just not for me.

30 How can I catch up to you in chat?

I'm on chat a lot, even now that school's back in session. You can probably catch me quickest via URNA (see my links). They have a great site and you don't need an account to use their chat. I'm also on Yahoo, but not nearly as much as I used to be. I usually have problems with their software so that keeps me away, plus people there are not always the most polite. Look for me at URNA under Andrea Portman, at Yahoo under andreaportman.

31 Where do you see yourself in five years?

I need to move somewhere warm. When I finish school, I'm thinking about packing up and moving cross country to southern California. I hope to be living full time as a woman by then without any problems. In 5 years I'll be...gasp...28 so I'd better have a lot of stuff accomplished by then cause I'm gonna retire at 30 ;-)

If you have any other questions, feel free to email them to me and if they are good (and not perverted) I'll add them here.


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